[it's hard not to bark a laugh at that, to not tell him how many people she's outlived and will outlive because no one else gives a single shit about them. But that's the kind of thing she's trying to just think about at night on her own, and makes a concerted effort to shove back under the bed like the proverbial monster it feels like now because there are still beautiful people to kiss and Arthur who's still...whatever he had been, before the first time she recalls seeing him, before the world had completely washed away everything she and Brian had done and was left more bleached than her damn hair]
As surreal as that is to hear, it's not unappreciated. Doesn't change the fact that I am having dreadful flashbacks of saying 'don't trust anyone over thirty' and being entirely serious.
[it takes biting her lip quite hard to hold back her laughter at that, even if it would be with him, because she almost remembers being that way, seeing someone across a room and thinking they were too beautiful to go near. But the shift of his hand--that passing moment of real connection, as light and fleeting as it is--sucks the majority of the amusement away. As much as she would have desperately wanted another person to look to at his age to make these things easier, she is still entirely sure she isn't the one to be looking to. But people like him--like them--worked with what they had because it had to be enough.
She sucks in a soft breath, before levelling her gaze]
One piece of advice is that I actually think isn't total rubbish; the ones you need some liquid courage for are generally worth it. You should be at least a little nervous before the first time you kiss someone. Also, don't worry about being a blithering idiot too much. Even if he's not--rock star caliber, usually a boy like that, who carries an instrument around? They're delighted if they can make you forget your own name. It's embarrassing, but the vast majority of the time worth the couple minutes you'll be wanting to go find a cave to hide in for the rest of your life.
[was she actually admitting she'd been a total twit around--well, maybe not Brian, of course not Brian, but anyone? She would have wanted to die from that, not long ago. Yet another reason this was all so damn surreal]
So, the sooner you get the embarrassing parts out of the way, the sooner you can get to finding out what else he knows what do with his hands.
no subject
As surreal as that is to hear, it's not unappreciated. Doesn't change the fact that I am having dreadful flashbacks of saying 'don't trust anyone over thirty' and being entirely serious.
[it takes biting her lip quite hard to hold back her laughter at that, even if it would be with him, because she almost remembers being that way, seeing someone across a room and thinking they were too beautiful to go near. But the shift of his hand--that passing moment of real connection, as light and fleeting as it is--sucks the majority of the amusement away. As much as she would have desperately wanted another person to look to at his age to make these things easier, she is still entirely sure she isn't the one to be looking to. But people like him--like them--worked with what they had because it had to be enough.
She sucks in a soft breath, before levelling her gaze]
One piece of advice is that I actually think isn't total rubbish; the ones you need some liquid courage for are generally worth it. You should be at least a little nervous before the first time you kiss someone. Also, don't worry about being a blithering idiot too much. Even if he's not--rock star caliber, usually a boy like that, who carries an instrument around? They're delighted if they can make you forget your own name. It's embarrassing, but the vast majority of the time worth the couple minutes you'll be wanting to go find a cave to hide in for the rest of your life.
[was she actually admitting she'd been a total twit around--well, maybe not Brian, of course not Brian, but anyone? She would have wanted to die from that, not long ago. Yet another reason this was all so damn surreal]
So, the sooner you get the embarrassing parts out of the way, the sooner you can get to finding out what else he knows what do with his hands.