xistentia | daemon: Wildd | NSFW daemon commentary

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arthur stuart (velvet goldmine)

daemon: Wildd | NSFW daemon commentary

RAINBOW MEME

Preferred Alias: Arthur

RED - Something about yesterday: I had coffee and toast for breakfast. I'm not very interesting.
ORANGE - Something you do well: [this space was initially left blank, helpfully filled in by Wildd:] Performing oral sex
YELLOW - Something about your childhood: I frequently found myself in trouble at primary school for daydreaming, and once for kissing another boy during lunch.
GREEN - Something you learned last week: How to make Long Island iced tea.
BLUE - Something you can't live without: Music.
INDIGO - Something you watch: I used to watch the news, but only because it's what my dad always had on.
VIOLET - Something you listen to: Gimme Danger.
Ask Me About My Rainbow

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[if she weren't nearly as anxious at times--and under really ridiculous circumstances if she thinks about it, considering she didn't let herself freak out when aliens were attacking the ship she was on but did around the man she liked--Amanda would laugh. But she is, so she doesn't]

I wish being able to change their behaviors meant I completely understand them, but I don't. Which is why I keep reminding Graced I could render her into the equivalent of a toaster if I wanted to.

But hey, remember how many people here are from Eudio. I don't think too many people will care. And most of them could probably have equally revealing things shared about them.

I think I'd like some toast. A lot of toast. Toast can't share intimate information with the entire bloody settlement.

It's not even really the oversharing though
I just
I don't
I'm not
I don't even know where it got the idea that I'm.

[Okay, that's a lie; Wildd was actually there the last time he engaged in that particular activity. He just hadn't realized it had been paying attention.]

I'll admit I like to but I'm not good at anything including....that.
It's not that I think anyone will judge me it's that I don't want to sound like a self-congratulatory prat

[yeah, she'd probably be about that rambly if it were her. She knows Graced has seen...things she hopes weren't recorded. It's bad enough living with a vampire who is also kind of an asshole about those kind of things]

Okay, I obviously can't speak about that, but I know you're good at some things. Don't talk yourself down like that.

[pot. kettle. Although she at least says she's 'pretty good' and will puff herself up about some things when it comes to her work since it's what she has]

Maybe that was it's roundabout way of saying the same thing. Or just being obnoxious as some of them seem to be when they get in the mood

[yes, a certain parrot is being reminded all but her most essential functions could be at least temporarily shut down if she pulls the same trick]

can't help it. I'm the resident brit. I'm allergic to talking myself up even if it were true.

What I don't understand is how a bloody bird would know one way or the other. Beaks and...the referenced activities seem to be mutually exclusive.

Fair enough. I'm still getting used to it, the shy geek girl thing takes a bit to wear off. I'll blame Kavinsky for not putting up with that from me as much.

I prefer not to think about it too hard, otherwise there will be images I am never getting out of my mind.

I think I'd rather think about bird sexuality than what everyone's bound to think of me after they read this.

[The worst part is they wouldn't even be wrong--he really is that easy, no matter how ashamed he is to admit it to himself. Just as quickly as the thought surfaces, though, he thinks of Mandy. How she'd look at him if he voiced any of these concerns to her, like she wouldn't be ashamed of him even if he slept his way through the entire settlement.

It doesn't exactly make him any less embarrassed, but at least it mitigates the constant edge of fear somewhat--that no matter how far away he gets from Manchester, his father is never more than a door away, ready to burst in with voice and fists raised and berate him for his behavior. Here, hardly anyone even gives his proclivities a second thought, or if they do it's because they're trying to pull him.

It's a lot like it had been when he first arrived in London, only even more nonchalant. As though it's not even an issue at all--as though most of the people he's met don't understand why anyone would object to it in the first place.]

sorry. i don't mean to get morose. this just isn't exactly how I wanted to spend my morning.

Edited 2017-11-02 23:11 (UTC)

[Amanda knows she can't speak on that; what she dealt with at home regarding her sexuality, or more the fact people assumed she didn't have one just because of her body, was awful but a different kind of awful. So she doesn't know the right words to say--she never does, but less so about this--to try to make it better.

She can't, she knows. No one could have made what she experienced better, and not just because they couldn't fix her body, and she doesn't think anyone could really make whatever Arthur dealt with better either]

It's okay. I can't say I get it entirely, but I'd be pretty upset if something like that happened to me. I get they're not always going to act in ways we want, and sometimes it might just be them glitching out, but it's still an invasion of privacy when it happens.

Judging by the look I'm getting as I'm writing this, I think it's pleased with itself.

I suppose a bird wouldn't have a reason to find this sort of thing embarrassing, though.

[There's a part of him that wants to tell her all of it, the whole awful story of the last time someone caught him with his trousers down, but he's had enough public embarrassment for several lifetimes. Later, when beady dark eyes aren't staring expectantly up at him from a little feathery head.]

[Amanda would get that; she's tempted to at least try to relate a bit by talking about some of the crap she dealt with back home, the incredibly distasteful jokes about 'sucking' some people made when they saw her using the straw to move her chair, but that's not anymore comfortable, and again not a conversation that should be had like this]

Probably not. Especially not a bird who is an embodiment of a computer program. It doesn't have the cultural context to get it. I sort of envy them for that.

[that Graced probably doesn't get why she wakes up some nights from nightmares where she can't move her legs or breathe and then has to spend a long time in front of a mirror to reassure herself it was just that]

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