VIDEO + SYNCHR; mjolnird

[drapes]

My friends, brothers and sisters in arms, fellow refugees - I need your assistance in settling an argument.

[ here's thor, with a starkly different haircut from last anyone saw him, standing before the camera looking a little more relaxed and a little more mischievous these days. maybe this whole thing is half him genuinely trying to win an argument with loki, and half him just being a little shit, because that's what brothers are for.

and it's nice to actually be a brother again. but we're not talking about that. we're just embarrassing loki. here we go. ]

My dearest, gentle, shy brother, Loki, seems to believe I never approve of his choice in lovers. Likely because his choice lovers are typically either lunatics, or unbearably obnoxious. I think it's his approach to the whole ordeal, so I thought I might do the worthy brotherly thing, and lend him something of a hand.

I've put together his Synchr profile, presented here for your perusal.

synchr

Loki, Son of Odin ▐ 1,000ish

Tall, dark and magic seeking romantic partner with greyish morality, a deep wealth of patience for direct mockery, and durable skin.

Requirements:
▸ minimal homicidal urges
▸ no history of melting people
▸ no running slave combat arenas
▸ has never become tyrannical lord of trash planets
▸ has never waged galactic war
▸ be quick on the uptake
▸ relatively resistant to all manners of death and dismemberment
▸ be a snuggler
▸ unlikely to piss off my relatives
▸ bedroom experimentation likely a plus, but don't get too weird with it
▸ laugh at my unfunny jokes
▸ long life span (at least a few thousand years)
▸ be a fan of leather & green
▸ enjoy laughing at the expense of others
▸ love snakes
▸ enjoy my stories, even if they're rude and exaggerated and only half true
▸ read a lot
▸ like magic
▸ feed me grapes while I watch bad theatre
▸ support regular hair care

Harm me ever, and my brother will end you slowly and painfully.

XOXO
Loki, Prince of Asgard

✓	✕
YES <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#2EB82E;">✓</span>	NO <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#CC0000;">✕</span>

[ is that thor, god of thunder, one eyed king of asgard, trying to hold in a snicker? nope, couldn't be. probably the cyclops thing messing up the symmetry of his face. must be. ]

Comments

[dothelokimotion]

[ WOW NO. ]

I am not cute. In any form or fashion.

[shadowblends]

[resisting the urge to cackle was almost impossible, but he manages.]

Says you. Other peoples' opinions may vary.

[dothelokimotion]

I am quite sure no one's opinion ever went in such a direction.

[shadowblends]

Is telepathy one of your abilities?

[dothelokimotion]

I have certain mental abilities, yes.

[shadowblends]

[Well, that makes him perk quite a bit.

He leans closer to the camera, head slightly tilted.] Do you think I'm lying, then?

[dothelokimotion]

[ Wryly. ]

I think you are enjoying that far too much for it to hold any kind of legitimacy.

[shadowblends]

[... gosh, what a smirk.]

Being able to lie is not something I've practiced.

[dothelokimotion]

As a consummate liar, I know all variations of lying.

[shadowblends]

Tell me, then— how am I lying, if that's what you believe might be happening?

[dothelokimotion]

A tease is not far off from a lie. You're simply trying to unnerve me.

[shadowblends]

So, because I'm teasing you, I can't genuinely be interested in going on a date?

[dothelokimotion]

Yes.

Was that unclear?

[shadowblends]

Apparently.

[Blinkblink.] Not like it matters, though. You made it known that you were uninterested, so I shall not pursue.

[dothelokimotion]

[ He softens slightly. ]

You are still young. I would not be a good match.

[shadowblends]

[Kurt does the same, eyes becoming downcast.]

Perhaps. I disagree, but as I said, I respect your decision.

[dothelokimotion]

And what grounds would you disagree on?

[ Personally he's still baffled why anyone seem to take this seriously. Loki is well aware that he is aesthetically pleasing, but beyond that, he has little to offer. ]

[shadowblends]

It doesn't matter.

[Because, as stated before, he's respecting Loki's decision to decline, although Kurt believes there's more to him than simply looking good.]

[dothelokimotion]

[ A pause. ]

It matters to me.

[shadowblends]

[His brow furrows with confusion.]

And why is that?

[dothelokimotion]

Why wouldn't it? It concerns me in some way, does it not?

[shadowblends]

It does, but I'm not sure why you would be curious about my thoughts when they're inconsequential at the end of the day.

[dothelokimotion]

Thoughts are rarely, if ever, inconsequential. Simply because they do not always take shape in an action does not mean they lack weight.

[shadowblends]

[He purses his lips, effectively silenced by Loki's words for a moment.]

Just because you're a millennium or two older than me, I don't see why that would deter a casual date. [A pause.] Or are there other reasons?

[dothelokimotion]

[ Plenty. Loki could lay them out and run short of breath. Even with his father's newfound (and sudden) acceptance, it wasn't enough. It's never enough for Loki. At the very least, after Asgard's demise, he has gained a measure of self-awareness he could not boast of before. Or perhaps he's merely more sensitive with those younger. He remembers the sweet sickly taste of youth once, in a bright golden city.

It's too much for him now. But he picks one reason out of many for this conversation. ]

I am not casual in nature. People like myself and Thor — we're forces of nature. Extreme, long-lived. We burn through the world like a storm and everything feels its ripples. Casual is not something we do well, if ever.