My friends, brothers and sisters in arms, fellow refugees - I need your assistance in settling an argument.
[ here's thor, with a starkly different haircut from last anyone saw him, standing before the camera looking a little more relaxed and a little more mischievous these days. maybe this whole thing is half him genuinely trying to win an argument with loki, and half him just being a little shit, because that's what brothers are for.
and it's nice to actually be a brother again. but we're not talking about that. we're just embarrassing loki. here we go. ]My dearest, gentle, shy brother, Loki, seems to believe I never approve of his choice in lovers. Likely because his choice lovers are typically either lunatics, or unbearably obnoxious.
I think it's his approach to the whole ordeal, so I thought I might do the worthy brotherly thing, and lend him something of a hand.
I've put together his Synchr profile, presented here for your perusal.
synchr
Loki, Son of Odin ▐ 1,000ish
Tall, dark and magic seeking romantic partner with greyish morality, a deep wealth of patience for direct mockery, and durable skin.
Requirements:
▸ minimal homicidal urges
▸ no history of melting people
▸ no running slave combat arenas
▸ has never become tyrannical lord of trash planets
▸ has never waged galactic war
▸ be quick on the uptake
▸ relatively resistant to all manners of death and dismemberment
▸ be a snuggler
▸ unlikely to piss off my relatives
▸ bedroom experimentation likely a plus, but don't get too weird with it
▸ laugh at my unfunny jokes
▸ long life span (at least a few thousand years)
▸ be a fan of leather & green
▸ enjoy laughing at the expense of others
▸ love snakes
▸ enjoy my stories, even if they're rude and exaggerated and only half true
▸ read a lot
▸ like magic
▸ feed me grapes while I watch bad theatre
▸ support regular hair care
Harm me ever, and my brother will end you slowly and painfully.
XOXO
Loki, Prince of Asgard
[ is that thor, god of thunder, one eyed king of asgard, trying to hold in a snicker? nope, couldn't be. probably the cyclops thing messing up the symmetry of his face. must be. ]