[ Hey everyone, welcome to the party in the woods! Or at least, what you can see of it behind this close up of Wyatt's grinning face. There are glittering lights in the background and the weird, mismatched music of the party can be heard. Wyatt has to raise his voice to be heard over it. ]

What is up guys my name is Wyatt, you probably all know that. Unless you're new, in which case, hey! Welcome to the Apocalypse! It's pretty dope here, you probably noticed. I'm telling you, F.A.T.E.S is so cool that he - or she. Or they? I don't know, whatever: they're so cool that they threw a full on multiple-day spanning party just for my birthday. Hey, F.A.T.E.S. -

[ He lifts his glass, filled with an unholy mixture of frothy golden beer, and deep burgundy wine, and salutes the camera. ]

- thank you, my guy. Slash girl. Slash, whatever you are. Hey, you should join us at some point, so that we know what the fuck to call you. Anyways.

[ He takes a drink of his disgusting cocktail, then drops down to sit on a pile of cushions. It's now evident that he's opted not to wear a shirt, but he is wearing cutoff jean shorts. The camera, otherwise known as his daemon Hunterd, follows to keep him in focus. ]

I got a kind of serious thing to talk about. The whole birthday thing has me thinking about, like. Age. And getting older, and shit, which you know, is important when like most of the people you know don't actually do that. When all your friends are like, hundreds of years old and fucking immortal, it puts a new spin on how it feels to be nineteen. I have one year left of teenage dreaming, people. [ He holds up his finger. ] One. So I'm thinking, like. Okay, I'm just gonna ask you, cause that's the whole point of this vlog.

If you had the choice to just not get older, but live forever. Would you do it? Like, is there a con to this pro? I mean, there'd be the whole, 'must drink the blood of the living to survive', deal, but my friends seem to manage okay. Vamps ain't so bad from what I've seen. So, yeah. Your thoughts, please, Youtube-Lite. I'm listening.



[ ooc: This post happens the day before the Confessions Bomb hits! ]

[ At this point, the meme glitches and breaks down, when Bunny Wyatt literally throws himself at Hunterd and begins a barrage of distressed squeaking. The daemon lets out a heavy sigh, before lowering himself, letting Bunny Wyatt jump onto his head, and walking calmly over to a mirror. Now massive black wolf daemon, and angry fluffy brown bunny, can be seen together. Hunterd clears his throat. ]

He would like me to add: he is very unhappy, he would like to change back at once, and if Joseph Kavinsky --

[ Hunterd pauses and rolls his eyes up towards the bunny. ]

I refuse to say it like that. There is no need to be rude to -

[ Cue more angry squeaking. Wyatt bats his foot on the daemon's head, and Hunterd sighs again. ]

If Joseph Kavinsky does not fix this 'huge fucking mess right the fuck now', there will be 'hell to pay'. [ The daemon clears his throat. ] Thank you for your time.